“From sleeping on the floor to being the CEO!”
This was the revelation God placed on my heart this week as I wrapped up another intense day of meetings. The pace has been so relentless that I almost let my fifth anniversary in this role pass without acknowledgment.
Having witnessed just how fragile life can be, I made myself a promise to be more intentional about celebrating any significant milestones that I have worked so hard to achieve. I also committed to no longer minimizing or downplaying my accomplishments, but instead to pause, reflect, and give thanks for God’s grace and faithfulness throughout my journey.
Almost as though God was scolding me for a broken promise made, the strong reminder of my humble beginnings stung me. I honestly can’t say that I ever aspired to be a CEO, but it’s clearly and unequivocally a path God had ordained for my future.
“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart.” ~ Jeremiah 1:5
What started out as a genuine pursuit towards becoming the best version of myself and showing up as a person that consistently adds value to the spaces I occupied, led me to assume a significant level of leadership responsibility which I do not take lightly. The truth is, the weight of leadership walks with me daily. So this really made me ask myself “how was it that I could so easily missed such a significant milestone?”
Truth is, I see it all the time! As women, we have been cultured to downplay our accomplishments. If we cheer ourselves on too loud we are full of ourselves and if we win too often we are boastful. So what do we do, we sweep every win under the carpet with a smile that says, “I’ll celebrate later or next time.” In addition, we are so busy focusing on the doing that we can so easily lose ourselves in the process of becoming.
This is definitely not about acknowledging a title, because I have lived long enough to know that titles are rented. For me, the commitment I made to start celebrating my accomplishments, is more about helping to rewrite the narrative we feed ourselves and allow others to feed us at times. I have no intentions of lowering my standard of excellence but simply intend to practice the art of pausing long enough to recognize and celebrate my most significant milestones and achievements. Performative leadership has become our trademark for way too long; the kind where we spend every passing moment in a constant state of over-proving and over-delivering to even recognize who we have become.
More recently at the Evolve Conference, a friend and someone I admire dearly asked me “how do you feel seeing the conference come alive?” Besides the feeling of relief from having to pull it all together, I had not taken the time to sit with my emotions for delivering such a stellar event that touched the lives of so many people.
Truth is, I am extremely proud of all I have accomplished on my journey to evolving. What I now need to sit with and accept is that there is literally no shame in acting like it. It’s not my fault though, that I suck at this, it’s the same reason why so many women struggle to accept a compliment. We were not cultured to embrace our wins.
I refuse to let my daughter grow up believing that humility means shrinking herself or downplaying her accomplishments because that’s what she observed from me – “grind, rinse, repeat”. She must understand that if you worked so hard to achieve greatness that it’s worthy of being celebrated! And that anyone looking on and taking an issue with that, they are welcome to leave.
Most times people don’t see the sacrifices made, the meltdowns, the struggle to achieve. That’s why for me, once you conquer the mountain you should be allowed to scream with excitement freely. There is no shame in acknowledging your victories.
Celebrating your victories isn’t about pride. It’s about acknowledging God’s grace and faithfulness over your life.
For far too long, I confused having humility with diminishing myself in the name of “being humble.” I have since come to realize that these two are not the same.
I know where I came from, and those values are deeply ingrained in my DNA. I was raised to be respectful, mindful of others, and to remember that pride comes before a fall. Those principles continue to guide me to this day. But I have also learned that humility does not require us to minimize our accomplishments or stay silent about the journey.
I have finally accepted that there is nothing wrong with being proud of the woman I have become or the goals I’ve worked tirelessly to accomplish along the way. I can remain grounded, give God the glory, acknowledge those who supported me, and still celebrate the fruits of years of sacrifice, perseverance, and discipline that led me here. Gratitude, confidence and self-love can coexist because humility and self-celebration are not opposites.
It’s recognition that you are evolving….
Life Lessons 